What goodies should you buy yourself and your loved ones this season? How the hell should we know? That’s why we recruited a couple of experts, for whom holiday spirit isn’t just an interest, it’s a birthright.

Photographs by
Jonathon Kambouris
Set design by
Amy Henry

AGE 26, NEW YORK CITY “My name was annoying when I was growing up, but I’ve since come to embrace it. Cashiers think they’re being funny, especially around this time of the year. I’m like, ‘Yeah, I know. Can I just have my debit card back, please?’”

AGE 40, BROOKLYN,
NEW YORK
“People get a kick out of
my name; it makes them
smile. It’s never bothered
me. Sure, the jokes can
get a little tired, but I
actually have an aunt
named Mary, so…”